The Big Fig Newton

yoel haalmoni (core@rof.net)
Wed, 2 Apr 1997 10:38:11 -0700 (MST)

>Izz said-
>
>>Would one of you, such as Rev. McDonald, please explain why the following is
>>not a contradiction in the Bible: In Matthew 21:19 Jesus cursed the fig tree
>>AFTER having cleansed the Temple. In Mark 11:14 he cursed it BEFORE
>cleansing
>>the Temple. So my question is, is this not a contradiction?
>
>Yoel wrote:
>Oh that's an easy one to get around (if you're a Christian inerrantist)!
>
>Izz:
>Really? We'll see!
>
>Yoel:
>Why, of course, Jesus did it before AND after he "cleansed" the temple
>(with a whip- it says in one gospel). Jesus was a whip wieldin', fig-tree
>cursin' kind of dude.
>
>Izz:
>Poor Yoel! His wits are addled, He thinks he is a fundie! :-) - very
>well, Yoel, you asked for it!
>
>Yoel, please explain how Jesus cursed the tree before and after? Go on, tell
>me how Jesus came upon a fig tree (Mark 11:12), cursed it, (Mark 11:14) then
>entered the Temple and overturned the tables "cleansing" it (Mark 11:15)
>(DON"T FORGET THER WHIP) then
>what? Did he leave and curse it again?

yoel-
I am consulting the Holy Spirit and.... (aggravating rotating clock
icon).... awaiting transmission.... Oh... here is the message.... it's
downloading... Oh, the Spirit says..."Yes". This is exactly what Jesus did,
in his divine wisdom. He cursed the fig tree, went into the temple WITH A
WHIP, kicked some Jewish ass, then went out again, so exhilarated from the
excitement that for good measure, he cursed it again.

Izzy
Whatsa matter, was his first curse too
>weak, the tree needed a double whammy from the Son of God?

yoel:
Who am I to question God? His ways are not our ways. He is perfect and can
do as he sees fit. Praise his holy name, halleluyah! He lives in my heart
and I know him as I know my pet Labrador Lulu. He walks with me and he
talks with me.

Izzie-
I am only a newbie
>on this list, so please be patient, I need these things explained!

Yoel-
Well, Izz, I love the sin but hate the sinner. As Jesus said, with man such
things are impossible but with God ALL things are possible. Repent, I feel
a spirit of cynisism in you.

By the way, Izzy- I agree with you 100%. Your observation regarding the
inconsistency in the NT is 10000000% valid. I was just attempting to
explain the lengths that irrational inerrantists will go to to defend the
obvious contradictions in the Bible.

Please stick around and see their mental manipulations and you'll see what
I mean.