Re: Coke Adds Life
Ian Dorion (dorioni@intellinet.com)
Sun, 13 Apr 1997 15:46:36 -0600
Ian Dorion wrote:
>
> IzzAtheist@AOL.COM wrote:
> >
> > > > > Mark 9:41
> > > > > >I tell you the truth, anyone who gives you a cup of water in my name
> > > > > because you belong to Christ will certainly not lose his reward.
> > > > > >
> > > > > >Yoel
> > > > > >Well, next time a missionary comes to my door, I'll just give him a
> > > cup
> > > > of
> > > > > >water, and I am bound to go to heaven! Wow! Keep in in mind, all of
> > > you-
> > > > > >don't convert, just give an xtian a cup of water!
> > > > > >
> > > > > >Izz <getting out the cup> oh, boy! ....Is it ok to call the xtian a
> > > > dummy,
> > > > > >after I give him his water? No? Too bad! Can I at least remind him
> > > that
> > > > he
> > > > > >has done a lot of work in the Lord's service, has put in a lot of
> > time,
> > >
> > > > has
> > > > > >had to follow a lot of silly rules, maybe even donated a tenth of
> > his
> > > > > income
> > > > > >or more, yet I may get to go in first? That's right, Jesus wants me
> >
> > > at
> > > > the
> > > > > >head of the line! <But I promise to wave to the Christian way back
> > at
> > > the
> > > > > >end!) It says...
> > > > > >
> > > > > >Matthew 20:16
> > > > > >"So the last will be first, and the first will be last."
> > > > > >
> > > > > >- parable of the Workers in the Vineyard!
> > > > > >
> > > > > >I will be waving!
> > > > > >First in gets the front seats!
> > > > > >Don't rush! I am still having fun!
> > > > > >
> > > > > >IzzAtheist
> > > > > ><with cup by the door>
> > > > >
> > > > > yoel-
> > > > > Dave, Magill, McDonald, Woodncock, Walt Jr.... Want a drink?
> > > > >
> > > > > If I give them all water, will I get more rewards?
> > > > >
> > > > > And what about Coke? Since Coke adds life, will it add ETERNAL life?
> > > > >
> > > > > Profound questions for profound minds.
> > > > >
> > > > > Ah, the mysteries of Christ...
> > > > >
> > > > Izz
> > > > Speak of the Devil! Guess who just knocked at my door?
> > > > Yes! Two Christians... I think. (they were Jehovah's Witnesses)
> > > > So... yes, I asked them to wait a second, closed the door, went
> > scurrying
> > > > into the kitchen... and got a cup of water! Then I went out, found them
> > > out
> > > > there still, and walked up to one of them and handed them the cup! (You
> > > > should have seen the puzzled look on his face!) Well, if Tony or Magill
> > > ever
> > > > come back, they better not tell me I am going to hell! I bet they never
> > > gave
> > > > a passing Christian a cup of water.
> > > >
> > > > Izz (was last, now Izz is first)
> > >
> > > (Ian 4/12) Izz you lying scoundrel, I don't believe a word you said. It
> > > sounds to me like you found god and don't want the rest of us to know
> > > about your conversion.
> >
> > Izz of God (4/12)
> > On the contrary, I published my conversion story for all to read. Now make
> > sure you start saving my letters, all scripture of Izz is given by
> > inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for
> > correction, for birdcages, and other good uses. I don't want people someday
> > complaining they don't have the autographs.... cause there aren't any, I am
> > doing this on a computer. But you can have my autograph for $10.
> >(Ian 4/13) Izz, the way this story was revealed to me is that when the Hebrew
Horde went into battle, they were losing badly. At that time, Moses held his
hands up in surrender. Now the Lord couldn't have any part of this so he turned
the tide of battle in Joshua's favor. Then Moses held up his hands in surrender
again. This happened several times before Aaron and Hur noticed what was
happening. You got the rest of the story right.
> > Izz
> > Exodus 17:10-12
> > "So Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and
> > Hur went to the top of the hill.
> >
> > As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever
> > he lowered is hands, the Amalekites were winning.
> >
> > When Moses' hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he
> > sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up--one on one side, one on the
> > other--so that his hands remained steady till sunset."
> >
> > That is hilarious. Mel Brooks couldn't do a funnier scene than that! Did they
> > put this scene in the "Ten Commandments"? Did Heston do this? ROFL
> >
> > PS. Honest. The two JW's came to the door. And they got their water!
>
> (Ian 4/12) And one of them was Jesus Christ. Sure!